9/8/07

Dearest Jessie,

I just hung up the phone with you and I felt like I sounded really sad while we talked and I wanted to tell you that I am doing really well.  I am happy most days, some days just get hard.  I need to just relax and let it go.

I know we already discussed it over the phone but I just wanted to say again how bad the gas chamber is.  I was pretty freaked out when I saw what happened to the first 2 groups of privates.  Then I got up to the line and I knew the only way out was to just do it.  I yanked it off and it seems like the gas was already in my lungs because the first breath I took was only half of one because I was cut off by a pretty painful cough adn it just got worse.  I could barely see anything and my eyes where on fire.  They then yelled at us to move and then stopped us for 10 seconds in front of the door.  It was the most horribly painful thing that has ever happened to me.

I am really looking forward to church tomorrow.  I have been reading the Book of Mormon and really praying every night and it feels really good.  I think I should carry around that little Book of Mormon everywhere when I get home so I can read all the time.  I read King Benjamin's address in Mosiah last night, "For the natural man is an enemy to God and has been from the fall of Adam and will be forever and ever unless he yields to the enticings of the holy spirit and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the Atonement of Christ and becometh a child, submissive, meek, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him."  That is all I remember off hand.  I'm down here in the laundry room putting every one's junk through the machines with a couple other guys.  Here is the type of building I am living in.

So that is the type of barracks we have, each floor has fifty privates which makes up a platoon.  4 platoons make up a battery and 6 batteries make up a brigade.  Our brigade has 1200 privates training at different stages.  There are (I've seen) about 8 or 9 of these buildings as we've walked around and there is probably more. Some of them are empty because the number are so far down.  No one wants to join during a war that has been going on for 6 years.  It's kind of sad.  Some of the drill sergeants say that the government is really close to issuing a draft because they are so desparate.

I just read all of the letters in the wonderful package you sent.  I loved everything.  You are so perfect. I will definitely reread that letter you wrote me many times.

I love you so much and that's it.

Brad